Dogmata

Dogma - is the established belief or doctrine held by a religion, ideology or any kind of organization, thought to be authoritative and not to be disputed, doubted or diverged from. It's current usage tends to carry a pejorative connotation — referring to concepts as being "established" only according to a particular point of view, and thus one of doubtful foundation. This pejorative connotation is even stronger with the term dogmatic, used to describe a person of rigid beliefs who is not open to rational argument.

I developed a set beliefs that were the guiding forces in my life. These beliefs were based on a particular set of ideals formed early in my youth.

I developed these beliefs so early in my life that I'm not sure I ever questioned them or I ceased to do so so long ago that I've forgotten. I held these beliefs without question, without even realizing it.

One of the deepest held beliefs I had was that I was an enlightened thinker and open-minded. The truth was that I was neither free nor open.

I thought that my beliefs were special because I was not constrained by old ideas and was able to question everything.

The truth was that I that I only doubted everything but I didn't really consider or investigate all sides openly. My ideas would have been credible if I would have perform a process of development that included investigation of opposing ideas. I Bought into ideas that went along with my desires and based on a shallow emotional response that I thought was substantial because I felt such strong covictions.

I didn't think up ideas and come to my own conclusions. I just heard things that sounded good from people who looked like they were having fun and really free. What I really did was buy a sales pitch.

I was always part of popular subcultures that I believed to be inherently individualistic and free from conformity and organization. I wore "non-conformist" clothes, I spoke "non-conformist" words, I listened to "non-conformist" music. But the truth was that I wore a uniform, spoke the jargon, and followed the crowd. In the seventies I was part of the "Rocker" subculture and followed their dogma, in the 80's I was part of the "New Wave" subculture and followed their dogma, in the 90's I was party of the "Popular" culture and followed their dogma.

I thought these ideas were new and progressive, a result of higher learning from higher science and higher technology. Today the ideas that were non-conformist have become mainstream. In looking at these ideas I don't see them as new any more but as ideas that have jut been cycling around throughout the ages.

It wasn't until my life was so utterly unmanageable and I lost my over-valued sense of self that I became willing to re-think my ideals.

I found that none of what I held before could be trusted. I found that I was so sold on my ideas that they dogged me all the way from being open to anything truly new to me.

I found that my old ideas met all the characteristics of "dogma". They were not to be disputed, doubted or diverged from. My beliefs were so rigid that I was not open to rational argument.

Here are some of my old ideas:
I will be happy if I do what feels good to me
I will be free and whole if I don't restrain myself
I can be a good person without having to be disciplined
If I need discipline, I can achieve it on human power
God is for weak minded people and I am not weak minded
Religion is for mind control and that is bad
Spiritual practices were necessary in the past but not necessary anymore
Spriritual ideas are based on superstition
Science/Reason and Spirituality/Religion are mutually exclusive

It wasn't until I became willing to question myself just as thoroughly as others that I was able to re-think and re-form a truly free set of ideals. These ideals had to be proven which meant they had to pass the test of time, prudence and effectiveness.

This meant that I also had to reconsider each idea that I previously thought to be conventional, established or dogmatic. Even the dogmas of organized religion.

The result was freedom from the bondage of self and a new set of ideals that are more credibly true, reasonable and open-minded.